I’ll admit, when I first heard about a life coach, I thought it was something for people with problems they couldn’t solve for themselves. Something that people paid a lot of money for that would just give them false hope. I wasn’t a fan of life coaching to say the least and I thought people like Tony Robbins and Brooke Castillo were frauds; preying on those who were desperate for a better life. I found myself criticizing something I knew absolutely nothing about. Not at least until I found myself having to get educated on the subject matter.
In this period of my life, I was at a crossroads. After fourteen years of military service, several more in corporate America, and even a few years of working with at risk juveniles, I found myself with a void that I did not know how to fill. I mean, I lived a very eventful, fulfilling, and blessed life. I did everything I was supposed to do. I went to school, served my country, and even gave back to my community. So, why did I feel like something was missing? After spending such a long time of feeling this void, I decided to seek the guidance of a counselor; thinking that would help me figure out what was missing in my life. Even though I learned a lot about myself and my past, it did not give me the sense of fulfillment I was searching for. Turns out, even though counseling was very beneficial for me, it wasn’t what I was needing. I was looking for guidance that was focused on the future. I was searching for something that would move me to be better. Even though I didn’t know exactly what that meant or what it would look like. It was something a counselor couldn’t help me with.
You see, a counselor helps you come to terms with past events so you can move forward in life. It makes sense. Again, I did learn a lot about myself and my past which allowed me to move forward on a lot of personal issues. But as I mentioned, my mind was focused on forward thinking. I knew there was a bigger plan for me, I just didn’t know what it was or how I would get there. So, I did the next the logical thing. I looked for a mentor. Someone who has been in the game for a while and knows a thing or two about life and success. Unfortunately, I found myself in the same position as I did with the counselor. Even though I did get a vast amount of valuable information from many great individuals, with beautiful minds; our time together was very short lived. After all, what was I expecting? A mentor is someone who shares their personal experiences and wisdom of their trade and mentorship usually works best when you share the same interest and trade.
Now, even though mentorship was not exactly what I was looking for, I knew I was getting closer. I knew I was on to something. Again, I just didn’t know exactly what I was searching for. Not until a potential mentor mentioned coaching to me. I must have worn my emotions clear as day on my face, because what he said next caught me off guard. In fact, he was very honest with me. He told me I was wasting both of our time and it was not mentoring that I should be looking for, especially for a field that I had no interest in. He said that I needed a life coach. Without trying to come off as rude, I questioned him. “Why a life coach? My life is not a wreck, and I am out here trying to do something about it. I just don’t know what I am looking for. What good would a life coach do me?” Without skipping a beat, he said “That’s exactly why you need a life coach. You have no idea what your goals are much less how to achieve them.” Then he began to explain what a life coach was. He said, “life coaching is a collaboration between you and another equal in a thought-provoking and creative process that will inspire you to unlock and maximize your potential to achieve your goals and desires in life. In short, it’s someone who helps you identify your life goals and really holds you accountable to them. Again, you need a life coach.”
That conversation rocked me a bit. I didn’t feel offended, but I did feel like I was called out. Now I knew I only had two options at this point. I can either continue this insane wild goose chase that I was on getting me nowhere or, check out what coaching is all about. So, I started looking in the one place everyone goes to, Google. My first search yielded over 10k results and guess who was on top of that list? None other than, Tony Robbins. I was a bit peeved about the whole thing but, what other choice did I have? I was done feeling stuck. I was tired feeling like something was missing in my life. After all, what would I have to lose? I can either sit around and whine about the direction my life was going in or do something about it. I signed up for coaching with none other than the Tony Robbins coaching team.
After my initial meeting with my coach, Kenny, I knew this is where I needed to be. After a few sessions, and several thoughts challenged things really started to fall into place. Every session I felt as if I gained a better understanding of myself and what I wanted for my life. I started to feel like myself again.
Knowing what drives and fulfills me, has allowed me to figure out what direction I needed to go in my life. Even in one of my coaching sessions, I had one of the greatest epiphanies. It turns out, I am a pretty damn good coach myself. I have been a good coach to my employees, I have been a great coach to my junior Marines, I have been a –real– good coach to the young men I supervised as a juvenile bootcamp drill instructor. I am a life coach!
Before too long, I got my credentials as a certified John Maxwell coach and my journey to helping others grow, began. I created iLEAD Coaching and every day I get up knowing I am going to help someone who is struggling to fill a void; someone who knows there is more to their life and are willing to do whatever it takes to get more for their life. I am helping someone who is ready to grow and make LIFE happen!